Lord Nanfoodle

Wat Do?!

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I end up going along with it, but I continue to be myself in the process. Perhaps there would be a silver lining in that I could encourage more guys to wear nail polish. Maybe I could get a CZ-75 with custom grips and paint my nails in a pattern to match the gun (and perhaps help undermine the bad image the NRA has given gun owners). And why not wear a unicorn kigu in the process? I could then discuss various books and periodicals while wearing a kigu as well. :notimpressed:

 

You wake up, and you find that COVID-19 has finally been mitigated. However, you find yourself dressed as G3 Rainbow Dash, and you are expected to hang out at the pre-G4 pony convention being hosted in the hotel. The only way out of your room leads through the main activities. Wat do?

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I try turning to the Viera and the Bangaa in my party for support. After hugging both of them, I feel better about my inability to get the flask. My party of oddballs then continues on with their eccentric quest.

 

You are fighting an enemy, and berserk is cast on you. You manage to overcome the enemy, but you don’t recall what happened afterward. You suddenly realize that you are dressed up in a Rarity kigu, and Diamond Dogs demand that you get to work. Wat do?
 

 

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Organize, strike, and drive a hard bargain at the table for the good of all stakeholders without compromising what labor is owed.

 

Your next post can contain no references to animal pajamas. What due?

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I consume copious quantities of sweets, pull my T-shirt up over my head, and talk about TP for my bunghole. Afterward, I will eat nachos, watch some music videos, and comment on how they “suck”. :awesomecheer:

 

You wake up in the not-too-distant future. The fifth generation of MLP proves to be an even bigger hit with adults than G4 was around a decade ago. However, every pony-related website and convention is overrun with drama (people nitpicking over petty details, discussions on furries trying to hijack the fandom, drama over another Howard Stern episode, etc.). Wat do?

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I don’t even eat Jolly Rancher candy, so I continue living my life as usual.

 

Lyra has dyed all of your socks strange colors. Not only that, but she has started wearing them. Wat do?

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Send her the bill when I buy some new socks, and NOT take into account depreciation from all the holes in the old ones.

 

You want to pose the next question as that famous one about the turtle in the desert from the fictional Voigt-Kampf test, from Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? by Philip K. Dick. But the only version quoted online is the Blade Runner version, which infuriates you because the movie got it wrong by posing it as a leading question instead of an open one. You don't have a paper copy to look it up yourself, and the library is shuttered due to that inconvenient deadly pandemic thing.

What do you do, Leon?

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I simply buy myself a copy of the book and add it to my personal library. 

You inadvertently become a “celebrity brony” with a mass following that subjects all of your online activity after G5 airs. Wat do?

 

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I use my newfound influence to promote my own personal tastes, interests, and preferences!

 

You receive a letter from a dear friend. Hoof-written, no less! But they neglected to use the Oxford comma at least 3 times. Wat do?

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I tell my dear friend's former composition teacher about it.  Hopefully that will shame my dear friend into remembering the importance of such things.

You wake up one morning to find out that your hair is now green.  As you start your day, you also find Spike giggling while hanging upside down from your living room ceiling. Wat do?

 

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File a missing dragon report and leave Spike with the shelter until he's claimed. Then try to find a way to live life with hair that's such an awful, awful color.

 

 

You wake up in a world without Zinc! Wat do?

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I end up hoping that medical science can find a way to overcome the lack of such a mineral naturally occurring on Earth.


You come home, and you find your furniture somehow stuck to the ceiling. Someone left an anonymous note and a bowl of gems, saying,

 

”I hope this furniture layout is more suitable for Ceiling Spikey-Wikey.”

 

Wat do?

 

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Sleep on the floor until I can get the sheetrock rehung sans furniture.

 

 

You dream fitfully. You remember only bits of the night's fantasies upon waking up. Something about a notepad, a knife, an old key to a lock you don't remember, and a blue bouncy ball from the 25-cent machines.

 

Wat do?

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I get a notepad and write down what I can remember.  After dwelling on it for awhile, I assume that it means I was correct in keeping my aging 2008 Toyota Corolla as a secondary car: a dealer would have given me very little for it on a trade-in (the blue bouncy ball's 25 cent price tag represents what they would give me for it); the old key to the lock represents potential difficulties in finding the way to open the "lock" to selling it to a private party (I am busy, and I don't have time to "babysit" potential buyers for test driving); and just like a knife, it is a useful and reliable "tool".

Rarity asks you to marry her.  Wat do?

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Seek professional help for my delusions. If imaginary creatures are asking me to marry them, clearly I have some sort of issue coping with something. Or perhaps a chemical imbalance.

 

 

The therapist says Spycrab can't hurt you, because it's not real.
Spycrab is in rhe corner of the room,  glaring menacingly.

Wat do?

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I pull my T-shirt over my head and loudly ask the Spycrab if it's threatening me. :awesomecheer:

People keep mistaking you for being a creator of lewd MLP art, pestering you with commentary and commission requests. Wat do?

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Pretend those messages never happened, and increasingly distance myself from deviantArt but feel guilty about it.

 

You overhear some Japanese visitors talk about how King of the Hill is better in the original English because of subtleties in the language that don't come through in the dubs. Whut do?

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I would feel like I could relate to those visitors very well, since when I watch anime I always pick sub rather than dub.

 

You see the Kotobukiya Rainbow Dash for sale at retail price at a store but someone else already has it in their hands and is looking at it!

wat due?

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I wonder why Ika Musume is in my neighborhood looking at that figurine in a small bookstore. :awesomecheer:

 

You end up taking a side job, but the employer pays you in an obscure and volatile cryptocurrency. Wat do?

 

 

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I sign up for Reddit and make everyone think said cryptocurrency is really funny, that way it will spike in value B) (in reality I would NOT do this, it would lowkey be a hustle teehee)

 

You find out that all the world's microwave burritos have been stolen and are being kept by an evil villain in the base of a volcano!

What do?

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Set the volcano to High for 2:30 and run. Run like the wind!

 

An allosaurus wearing a clown wig steps out of a time portal and points a futuristic ray gun at you. It snarls menacingly, but with perfect Midwestern American English gloats "I've got you now, jerk!" Your response?

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Chop off their head with an axe while screaming, "I THOUGHT I ALREADY TOLD YOU THAT ABBREVIATIONS DON'T COUNT IN SCRABBLE, TOD!!" :dealwithit:

 

Everything you touch (other than yourself, of course) for no reason whatsoever now explodes on contact with you. Wat do?

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I wonder if there are exceptions to the rule, as I am apparently still around after my sandals exploded while trying to strap them to my feet (I am witnessing such things and wondering what to do). Afterward, shouldn’t the soles of my bare feet have blown up my home and then the entire planet afterward due to me contacting such things?

 

You are continually followed everywhere you go by unicorns with tennis balls on their horns. Wat do?


 

 

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Walk into a Unicorn Trap and get a cut of the revenue.

 

Meals are prohibited, all nutrients must be had through snacking only. What do?

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