Cookiepony

1000 ways to get kicked out of a grocery store

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Murder several of your fellow customers in order to amass the blood needed to form summoning contract needed to be able to perform the necessary jutsu to allow you to summon the stock boy at your leisure in order to ask them to confirm the price of a family size box of Life cereal.

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Pour out all the ice cream, sour cream, cream cheese, and yogurt in the store on the floor and use it all as a slip-and-slide. Summer fun!!

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Wear all the ice cream in the freezers, douse yourself with all the chocolate syrup, put a cherry on your head, grab a bunch of 2-Liter Cokes that you shake up, and then begin running up to people screaming at them, "We all float down here!! WE ALL FLOAT DOWN HERE!!" while spraying them with soda.

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Throw pineapples at people, then become salty at them when said pineapples don't turn into piles of Hi-Chew like in the commercial, telling the people they're doing it wrong.

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Break into the back offices and replace all the muzak that plays over the PA system with booming Scandinavian death metal with plenty of blast beats.

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Help someone right their capsized shopping cart, then walk around the entire store telling everybody "They used to call me a nancy, but I guess they should have called me NANCY CART-RIGHT! HAHA, GET IT? BECAUSE LISA SIMPSON?!?!?"

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Melt down all of the plastic spoons in the middle of an aisle. Loudly complain of their inability to inflict 9999 damage in the process.

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Dump a bag of flour on the floor and take the empty bag with you.  Be sure to point out that you aren't actually stealing the flour.

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On 9/19/2019 at 7:13 AM, M2 Ball said:

Try to boop the cashier 1000 times.

You. My friend. Need some help. xD

 

Paying for something expensive in one cent coins, slowly counting them and everytime someone interrupts you, you say "Great. Now i forgot where i was." and start counting all over again.

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