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Pony Life Episode 4: Cute-pocalypse Meow

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Title: Cute-pocalypse Meow

 

Synopsis: As Pinkie Pie practices for the Royal Jelly Juggernaut, Fluttershy makes an adorable new friend with a dark sense of humor. Fluttershy has to muster all of her cuteness to protect her friends from Bubbles dark side.

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Pony Life Episode 4.

 

 

The Episode starts out with Pinkie Pie saying how she wants to see everyones "game face" which, i guess, means serious face?

 

With yelling and growling they're all getting ready to do some serious baking, and for a moment Pinkie turns her hair into a muscular arm,

 

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kinda like Sandy did with her tail in Spongebob,

 

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before Fluttershy ends it with "The cake is yours to take. Gaaaaaaaaah.". Apparently this is so adorable to the others that they all go "Dawwwww."

 

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which makes Fluttershy shrink out of embarassment? Okay.

 

Rarity says that Fluttershy is adorable when is trying to be tough to which Fluttershy responds by saying she has a dark side

 

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before trying again. This time with dramatic lightning and dark background and shit.

 

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Only for her to fail again and a get more "Dawwwwwwws" from her friends.

 

Fluttershy being dawwed for trying to be "edgy"? New friend with an evil dark side? Is this episode gonna be Fluttershy trying to be more confident and agressive again under the influence of a new character introduced in this episode, only for her to hurt someone and realize that she has gone to far and that she should just accept herself as she is with all her strengths and weaknesses and not fall under the influence of some sketchy stranger? That's my prediction, a little over minute in.

 

Later that day, Fluttershy is sitting on a bench near a playground. She watches a group of ants approaching a child, his mother and their picnic basket while semi dramatically describing the situation out loud for some reason. Which is a little bit stupid, if you ask me.

 

Also, the child looks a lot like the ugly filly from Episode 2. I guess that's their new design for new fillies and colts in this show?

 

Remember when most little fillies and colts looked cute? No matter how important or unimportant they were?

 

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Anyway. Moving on.

 

To Fluttershys surprise, a talking cat continiues her decription of the situation before introducing himself as Bubbles Cherup McSquee (Wtf, that last name). He sits down next to her and they continiue doing the same shit a little longer before breaking out in laughter while the ants ACTUALLY manage to carry that picnic basket away.

 

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Also, there is a big circle shaped hole in one of the hills in the background, and I wonder how it got there.

 

Back inside Sugarcube Corner where everyone is sippin some Milkshake with Fluttershy laughing at a table in the corner. Rarity walks over to her, remarking how Fluttershy hasn't even touched her gigantic triple choco loco shake yet, which falls apart from one second to the next with convenient timing just as Rarity points at it.

 

Just before Fluttershy is able to show her what she has been looking at on her tablet 

 

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Rainbow Dash grabs it and Fluttershy quickly whips out her Amazon Kindle Fire

 

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from behind her back to keep texting.

 

Rainbow Dash reads out loud "I'm at an art gallery but it's more like a fart gallery. These painting stink." which is some top tier first grade humor there. Laughing tears, Fluttershy remarks how funny Bubbles. Applejack says "Isn't that kinda mean?" to which Fluttershy responds with "Mean? He's just got a dark sense of humor. Just like me." Even though Fluttershy doesn't really have a dark sense of humor. The others then decide to invite Bubbles.

 

Next we are at the gym where Applejack and Rainbow Dash are worried that Fluttershy may be coming to late

 

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before she and Bubbles arrive. Bubbles takes a closer look at a nearby vending machine which is filled with fruit and vegetables that will have to be replaced at the end of the day because at least fruit in a warm room expires in the matter of hours. Applejack greets Bubbles and says how she has heard much about him to which he responds with "Bet'cha have." to Applejacks disliking.

 

The Mane 6, Bubbles and a few background characters (who are really excited for some excercises. Calm down mates, it's just excercises)

 

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start doing exercises, with Bubbles cracking more annoying jokes and popping the gymnastic ball Fluttershy was using. She doesn't mind though, she finds it funny and laughs.

 

After that we see Fluttershy deadlifting some heavy weights with Bubbles on top of on side,

 

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because who ever fucking wrote this shit has no understanding of Fluttershys physical capabillities and character whatsoever, before Bubbles with his unbelievably strong tail pushes off the weights on the other side of the barbell, which aren't tightly secured somehow by a lock or something

 

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and makes Fluttershy fall.

 

He then literally throws her off a yoga mat and at her friends next to her to which Fluttershy herself says "That hurts." before following that up with "But it's still fun." Also, in scene in which they are doing yoga, it's Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, Applejack and Fluttershy but after Bubbles threw Fluttershy off her yoga mat and towards her friends Pinkie Pie isn't in the pile that results in but instead it's one of the random background ponies.

 

Rainbow Dash gets angry at Bubbles who pulls a "I'm sorry. Please forgive me while looking into my big sad eyes." thingy,

 

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and Fluttershy obviously falls for that.

 

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You know what else Fluttetshy falls for? Bubbles friendship bracelets.

 

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We then go to a bookstore where they show Spike for the first time just completly out of fucking nowhere in the most casual way possible.

 

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With tears in his eyes he calls the bookstore the most coolest place he has ever been to in his entire life (something Twilight should have said) and (out of excitement, i guess) he creates a bubble in which he levitates

 

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before Bubbles (the character) calls that sad and it pops.

 

He insults a bunch of books without anyone shhhhhhhhhing him

 

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and as the grand finale he tears down this statue, made by this character

 

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(who looks a little bit like Cozy Glow)

 

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who says he took 3 months to make it, which also makes all the bookshelves around them collapse somehow?

 

This must be the owner because i don't think they would just let some random visitor walk into the bookstore and build a bookstatue for 3 months without throwing them out. But even so, why would he (she? I'm not sure about that voice) want to build a statue out of books? Is he bored? And how the fuck did this statue take him 3 months to build? I'm pretty sure you could build this thing in a day or two.

 

Fluttershy is shocked. But only for 3 seconds before being all cool with it again after one "Oopsie." from Bubbles.

 

Even Spike comments on this with "There is no way she would fall for this."

 

BUT SHE DOES.

 

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Twilights reaction to this is also underwhelming and really weird. She just says "Can you two help?" Like she didn't just fucking see what Bubbles did.

 

A bookstore just got destroyed by a dickhead with no respect and someone got emotionally hurt (because of a fucking book statue). Twilight should be furious.

 

Sooo, let me get this straight. Fluttershy now not only deadlifts weights but also lets Bubbles just toss her around, destroy things and hurt her, her friends and other characters? Excusing it all by just writing it off as fun and dark humor?

 

FUCK THIS EPISODE!

 

And we've only reached the halfway point.

 

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Back inside Sugarcube Corner everyone has gathered around Pinkie Pie to be the testers for her new cheesy spinach cupcake.

 

Fluttershy and Applejack complain about how something that looks more like lunch imo is still too sweet to which Pinkie Pie responds by saying she HAD TO add sugar because they are cupcakes after all. She get's all sad, says how she'll never win the Royal Jelly Juggernaut and Bubbles responds by saying that Reality TV is trash, to everyones shock.

 

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Now this get's a more proper reaction out of Twilight because insulting Reality TV is mean. Pinkie can't take it anymore and she explodes into a pile of grey confetti and Fluttershy gets once again mad only for Bubbles to calm her down again with a couple of words. At this point i'm honestly convinced that Bubbles has some hypnotic mindcontrol abillities on Fluttershy.

 

But what is this? Fluttershy snaps out of it for a second?

 

Nope. Bubbles whips out this thing and shes all catmouth over it.

 

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Enough is enough. Rarity slaps it out of Bubbles paws, once again remarking on how mean he was to their "Ms. Pie". And i guess Pinkie has reassembled herself out of that pile of grey confetti.

 

Fluttershy is having enough too now. Bubbles says "If you can't handle me at my realist, you don't deserve me at my cutest!" which is such a stupid line of dialogue, before leaving and taking his anklet with him, much to Fluttershys disliking.

 

She get's all sad, saying how she has never seen him so mean before, because in this episode Fluttershy is fucking braindead, as her friends join in in agreement.

 

Gif of sad Pinkie Pie,

 

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Fluttershy then get's angry and swears to show Bubbles her dark side before growing in size,

 

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probably getting ready to stomp him to death.

 

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She pays Bubbles a visit (back in her normal size), who says that their friendship was fun while it lasted but now he's too cool for her friendship, which really pisses off Rarity for some reason.

 

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He then introduces them to his new best friend, Buttershy, who, urgh,

 

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i mean, just look at her. It's disgusting.

 

Fluttershy is upset for a moment but she ends up telling Bubbles she had enough of him. Bubbles then pulls one last "Uhhhhhhhhh, big eyes cute, uhhhhhhhhhh, don't be mad"

 

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even though he just said he doesn't care about Fluttershy anymore, so why bother trying to hypnotize her again, to which Fluttershy responds by countering with her own cuteness instead of just walking off. Whats this supposed to do?

 

We now get one of the dumbest scenes i have ever seen,

 

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so dumb in fact that Rainbow Dash kinda faints, and it all ends with Bubbles blasting off into the sky

 

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and exploding like a firework.

 

Fluttershy apologizes, group hug

 

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And they walk off into the sunset.

 

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I guess the majority of this show does take place near the ocean now.

 

A short scene in which Buttershy asks Bubbles to make her laugh (i guess she hasn't even noticed what happened around her, or she just doesn't give a fuck) to which he responds by screaming in agony happens, and we're back at Sugarcube Corner again.

 

One last scene of Pinkie Pie serving her friends desserts, Applejack comments on how she improved and Fluttershy makes a stupid face.

 

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The end.

 

 

Wow, Jesus fucking Christ, this episode was terrible.

 

First off, Fluttershy befriending Bubbles because she sUpPoSsEdLy has dark humor. Not even acknowledging how this is bullshit by FiM standarts, but even staying within the realm of Pony Life, in the previous three episodes there wasn't a single moment in which Fluttershy showed signs of having "Dark Humor". This makes no fucking sense and once again only happens for the sake of kickstarting the plot of a poorly written episode.

 

Speaking of dark humor. Second. Do you know who has dark humor and is an edgy prankster, much more fitting for role as the main character of this episode? Rainbow Dash.

 

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I guess the writer of this episode either didn't know that or thought turning Fluttetshy into a weightlifting abomination sounded fun and like a good idea. Fuck you, it isn't.

 

But then i guess then it would have been a bit too much of a rip off of a much better episode with actually well written characters in which an edgy main characters even more edgy friend goes to far with their shenanigans.

 

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Third. Fluttershys cuteness exists to her detriment and as a weapon now? Great! Just like it the fans see it, right?

 

To end this review off i'm just gonna say what i said halfway through the episode again.

 

FUCK THIS EPISODE!

 

3/10.

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